It's been like a week since I last touched a computer. Right now, everything has been so mundane. Study till late > Home > TV > Sleep. Can't wait to break free from this cycle on 4th Oct. :>
In school studying with Cheryl and Javier. Productive yet it's not. Been having this nrigfnriei feeling for the past 2 days. And whatever's going through my head now isn't making anything any better. Sigh. :/ Shall continue with Ecornomickz soonish, right after this post.
I like to blog.
You left my life and you're coming back once again. And then you're gonna leave again. This cycle is so repetitive. I never thought that I still had something for you. It has been 3 years and yet when I think about it now, the feeling is still so raw, so tangible. I guess despite everything, I still.. like you. And it's not something I would want, honest. Really, after thinking about it, I think I've just been shutting you out so much for so long. Because you come in after a few months and leave suddenly, I can't really comprehend what you really want from me... If this is the feeling you're giving me, I rather you leave permanently. Save me from this misery, especially not two days before the P's. You're sucking my thoughts dry. I just want you to know.
"Smart people think with their heads, stupid people think with their hearts. Be stupid." Yeah right, if I chose to be stupid, I'll not only be hurting myself, but even people I don't even know at all. I can't live with this guilt.
<3 nella.
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